How to deal when husband leaves marriage of 22 years?

Recently I found out that my husband was unhappy with our marriage. Which was news to me. I thought everything was fine. He asked me to quit my job so we could have more time together. So I did %26amp; for the last 2 months we spent many romantic times together, I thought everything was going great. Then I found out he had been having an on line affair with an old girlfriend from his jr high school days. He told me that she was his ';soul-mate'; and that he loved her and that he had been having an on line affair with her for the last 7 months. (including the 2 months he had been ';trying'; to work it out with me) He told me he spent 3 days with her last week when he was on vacation. She is married too (but divorce almost final) like that matters, and with 13 year old child. I told him to move out. We are getting a divorce. Our 2 children will have joint custody. He has ruined everything I held dear. He was my life my love my everything. Now how to dealHow to deal when husband leaves marriage of 22 years?
That is sooo sad. I am sorry to hear that. Well, you cannot make someone love you. Let him go, maybe he is just going through a mid-life crisis. Either he will come back soon begging for forgiveness or he will stay gone. Either way, you are better off without him if he wants to be with someone else. If he stays because he feels sorry for you and not because he wants to make it work he will probably just end up cheating on you some more or make both of your lives unhappy. Try spending as much time with your kids to cope.How to deal when husband leaves marriage of 22 years?
First let me tell you my heart goes out to you, what was done to you is the ultimate betrayal. But, life does and will go on, so just take it one day at a time. Try and concentrate on your children because I'm sure they are very heart broken over this, also. One day soon, you will realize you don't want to shed tears over someone that isn't worth shedding tears over.


I went through this with a friend that was married to a lawyer, had two sons almost grown and her husband fell in love with a gal he had taught law to. She was 25 years younger and thought she was another Paris Hilton. The lawyer divorced his wife of over 24 years. When the two boys left home, my friend moved 80 miles away and got a job in a bank. Three more years passed and she married the bank president. Is that not the best revenge in the world, being happy again?


Now the lawyer's little Paris Hilton got bored with the older guy and started cheating on him and he ended up getting a divorce. I will bet he will regret to his dying day, he let his first wife go for a bimbo.


So, you see, no matter how bad you feel right now, life will get better and I hope for you all good things. The one thing you have that is worth more then anything... is your kids.
I too went through divorce...a very awkward one but I too considered him my everything. He abandoned my son and I during the most crucial time in our lives but we both came out of it stronger without him. All because of faith in God and family support.


I wont lie I was completely crushed but I really had no time to think about it then as i had other things to think about.... but I found a lot of writing in journals, talking to God, and reading a lot of inspiring, self-help books. I have always believed it is easy to be defeated and most everyone in this world don't care how much you are hurting (this is the time they can only further make u feel isolated %26amp; make u feel worse about your situation) so you must take care of yourself for your kids and for yourself. No one else can do thr job that you can do the best in taking care of yourself. You are hurting and it would be wrong to deny those feelings. You need to take some time out and deal with those feelings so that you can remain strong for your kids. This will take time for sure, its not gonna heal overnight. AND don't think how happy he is or must be as he seems to have moved on, get that thought of your head because it will only eat you up.


It took me about 4.5 yrs to deal with it because I thought we could get back together, I however was living in a unreal world and now I realize what a waste of time that was trying to show to them what they are losing when he just didn't care and that hurt me more then him leaving me.


I just hope you can realize your potential and that he is missing out because seriously now, how long is that relationship going to last(not very much so, in my opinion, i think they both just chasing fake realties)??


You need to be there for yourself so you can take care of your kids. You and your kids are important not him(he is out of the picture) as hurtful as that sounds.....take care and best of luck


God bless....