Friday, August 20, 2010

Husband moves back in with ex to deal with childs emotional prob?

My soulmate, dearest friend in the world husband just announced to me that he needs to move back in to his ex's home to be with his kids. We have been married 2 years. He has 2 kids - a daughter 15 and son 19. The son is having some emotional difficulties with anger etc...He says he doesn't know how long this will take. His ex-wife and I have discussed the fact she has no feelings for him anymore and the son said he needs his dad there. My husband does not want me to divorce him and wants me to give him time to deal with this and not give up on him. His ex-wife has instructed my husband that he will have to sleep in his son's room also. How long should I let this go on? I just happened today, but husband has dealt with guilt for a while. I feel left out in the cold as this seems like it could take years. My husband still wants to come take care of my household chores but theirs too. We have no kids together but I do. This is weird. He wants to be married to me. Help!!!Husband moves back in with ex to deal with childs emotional prob?
I don't think hes leaving.He could have handled the problem with out moving in.Husband moves back in with ex to deal with childs emotional prob?
Think about this....If he puts the well being of his children ahead of the well being of his marraige, then he should never have left them in the first place.
well he left his wife for you so he may turn it around it may back fire you may wind up hurt his ex wife might been hurt but put up with it for thier kids yeah right hes not sleeping with her just there for his son you better hope thats all
This son of his is manipulating this whole thing. He is 19, legally an adult! If he has ';anger'; issues he needs to get counseling for them. If your husband gives into this now, he will never have a back bone. Yep, they are his kids. But he's your husband! These children aren't little anymore. They are old enough to understand that Dad has a new wife and an new life. Sounds like he is available for the children, but they are demanding more...I would NOT let this happen. I know it's something he has to come to terms with. He would blame you if you tried to stop him, but you should push him towards NOT moving in and arranging some professional counseling for his children and his ex-wife.
sounds pretty far fetched to me.....not sure that this is the best solution for anyone let alone the son who will certainly be getting mixed messages...this is something that should be handled by professionals and I doubt they would agree with this arrangement.....
That's weird. That's shockingly weird. Maybe the son should move in with you guys...if that's not an option, kiss your marriage good bye!
Years!? I dont think I could do that. If it was a shorter time period maybe but thats so long. Why cant the son move in with you or the son in father get a place together. That might make you feel more comfortable with it.
This sounds pretty strange to me. He can help his kids WITHOUT moving back into his ex's house. If his son has anger issues he might not be able to help him anyway. He may need professional help.
Sorry, but either your ';dearest friend'; is lying to you or is less than intelligent. At 19 his son is a grown man. Any issues your husband can help him deal with now do not require that ';daddy'; is there 24/7 holding his hand. Your husband probably feels responsible for the boy's problems, but he is wrecking your life to try to rectify past mistakes. Simply ask him not to do to his current family what he feels guilty about having done to his first family. Do NOT accept this living arrangement, or your marriage is essentially destroyed.
I'm so sorry for this situation which has been forced on you. I believe that a 19 year old's anger issues should be dealt with professionally rather than by amateurs. If his emotional issues are as serious as is being presented to you, putting the father back into the picture is not going to solve the emotional problems but will serve to make them less likely to be resolved.





If the family truly believes that being around his ';missing'; father is the solution, why don't you and your husband let the son move into your home, make him go to school and get a job, so he can learn to be self-sufficient.





p.s., This is such an unusual situation that I think you should question everyone's version of this story. Protect yourself legally by consulting a matrimonial attorney quietly without your husband knowing you are doing so.
it could be solved by moving the kid in with him and you. he wants out. no one could be that dumb.
It's just a lame excuse for him to leave you
Im sorry but i think you need to kiss your marriage good bye and leave and get what is due you and your kids and move on . Your husband is obviosly not man enough to speak up to his ex wife and tell her to blow off cause he was not moving in this is just going to confuse the son and it will never end . the boy will continue to have problems . the ex will always expect the dad to handle them . Just go you cannot win in this one and it is time to move on . Get a divorce lawyer and be done with it .

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