Tuesday, August 10, 2010

As a military wife how can I help my husband deal with Post Traumatic Stress?

He has been to several wars and done and seen alot. How can I help him deal with this when he is not ready to talk to me about the things he had to do over there. I t has put a large strain on the marriage and i do not want to lose him. He is seeking help but I kinda feel lost as how I can help him through this.As a military wife how can I help my husband deal with Post Traumatic Stress?
This is the one area the VA does not deal with but should...spouses. Family Services usually have some answers at the base. Other than that I would call the VA, Social Work Service and ask if you can come in for a consultation with a worker (as a courtesy) tell them what you are seeking and how difficult it is and ask if they have a program for wives of PTSD patients. Feel free to call the center director if you are not satisfied. It really is a pity that they have not addressed this issue as wives spend 24/7 with these patients and are the caregivers without training. Keep going, call your congressman too. Keep making noise...you have a lot of company but even the PTSD patients had trouble getting diagnosed. It took about 7 years for them to be heard after Vietnam. Persistence pays. Good luck.As a military wife how can I help my husband deal with Post Traumatic Stress?
OMG. Just be patient. Try not to treat him like he has a problem. It will take him time, but its wonderful that you are there to support him. Try not to force him to talk to you about it. WHen he is ready, he'll open up. I can imagine how hard this may be on the both of you right now. When people try to get you to talk to them about your issues, it causes you to shut down...well, thats what I did anyway...Stick by him and keep being supportive. Over time, the hard times get easier. good luck
Most PTSD sufferers enjoy alcohol.
military one source-They can help you find help for him and you either on post or off.


The post where you are located probably has a hospital right?....usually military hospitals have programs for PTS. You can't do this alone. It's not like other wars where the military knew nothing of PTSD, now they know all about it and have done something to help. But you have to seek it.
I wished my wife would have been understanding about it calm and gave me my space when i wanted it and comforted me when i needed it.
There's a really good self help book called Growing Beyond Survival. While it deals with a lot of child abuse issues, it mainly deals with ways to understand and manage trauma symptoms that interfere with everyday life. There are several things you can do to help:


1. Be supportive, comfort and normalize. He's trying to work out experiences that are inherently overwhelming. Let him know you care, you know it will take time, and that you are willing to help.


2. Develop your own support system so you don't burnout.


3. Educate yourself (and children if you have them) about traumatic stress. You have to be able to recognize when he's have a PTSD reaction so you don't take things personally.


4. Check with your local VA to see if there are support groups for you or for both of you as a couple.





Best of luck!
listen to me


look for the nearest VA center near you and talk to the doctors there..call up and make an appointment and YOU go talk to them..then try to get him there..


good luck


smile
Be supportive but don't push him to talk if he doesn't want to (some guys don't). Consider some counseling as a couple, but don't place the blame on the post-traumatic stress.
a vacation will help give him space and support don't ask questions let him work it out above all else be patient

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